Thursday, August 8, 2013

I'm just not quite ready...

To make this blog public yet.  You know, I've gone back and forth about going public with my blog for quite some time now.  I went into great depth about my thought process on the whole subject in this post.  And to be honest, I literally almost hit the "share on Facebook" button many times.  I've wanted to take a screen shot of my blog and instagram it.  I've been tempted to email the posts to family members just to see what kind of response I would get.  And each time it came time to do that, I've chickened out.

I mean, where else can I go to post completely random thoughts, videos and pictures of myself without feeling like I'm being judged??  Where else can I talk about trials, hurdles and struggles without wondering what my friends are thinking of me?

This is my place.  My place of quiet.  My place of soothing, calming, relaxation.  This screen is empty, until I fill it with words that make me, me!  I can truly, 100% be myself here.  What you see on this screen, is exactly who I am.  I don't hide things.  I don't sugar coat things.  This is the real deal, Jenna.  I just feel like, sometimes, with my "real life" friends, I have to word things a certain way as to not press any buttons.  To make everything seem perfect.  When in all actuality, that's not who we, as humans, are.

So, I come here (almost) everyday, and speak my mind.  I know that y'all are out there reading me, and either laughing, making fun, or judging me...but you know what the great part about blogging is??  We are a community.  We all started blogging for a reason.  It might not all be the same reason, but we are here to support one another through it all.  Now, I'm not an idiot, and I know that there are definitely some negative Nelly's out there, but I don't personally know them, so they can't hurt me or my feelings. (For too long, anyway!)

If you don't care to read about my life, then go another way.  It may be brutally honest to some, but it's the truth.  I am doing this for me.  I started this blog for that reason, not exactly knowing what all came with it, and just letting it kind of take care of itself.  But, with that, and by being me, I have found some of the most amazing blog friends a girl could ever ask for!!  I am not kidding you when I say that I know of at least a handful of women out there in blogland, that I've never actually met, that would be in my corner and would watch my back if I ever needed them to.  And that, my friends, is more than I could ever ask for.

I don't want to have to spare my words on here, in fear of hurting one of my real life friends' feelings.  I don't want them to look at me any differently just because I said something that they didn't agree with.  I want to be able to post "selfies" of myself.  My son.  My house.  I want to brag about the great, and complain about the bad.  To share life's ups and downs without wondering what they are thinking.  And that, y'all is why I'm just not quite ready.
Yep...definitely wouldn't be posting these to facebook and instagram...
Will I be in the future??  Maybe...But until that day comes, I'm going to keep on, keeping on... :)

Until next time...


  1. Wow I feel the exact same way!! I share things on my blog that I normally would never tell my friends, or like you said I would word it completely different. I like the freedom you have with your own blog. And to be honest, I really don't want some of my friends and family reading about me trying to lose weight and how I'm a binge eater than can inhale a foot long The great thing about blogland is there are so many people out there that can relate to you, and they are super supportive!

  2. Hang in there... We all go through this... and eventually everyone comes around... and if not... then I agree - I just keep on keepin on!

  3. I understand where you're coming from but when you do decide to do it...just go for it! I actually started my blog "publicly" if you will. I started it as a place to share stories, thoughts, news, etc. with my family when we moved away. It has morphed into so much more and I don't really feel compelled to hold back or change what I say because people I know IRL are reading. You'll get to that point too. Until then, just keep doing what you do sister because you have plenty of bloggy friends ready to read your rambles!

  4. I think a lot of people can relate to you here, including myself. I have only been blogging a few months amd I feel like I am apart of a community and I am not alone! I dont feel judged even though it is on the internet!

  5. Oh, Jenna, honey!!! I'm emailing you as we speak! Clearly, I agree with you and am in your corner 100%! I have waaaaaaay too much to to say to post on your blog wall!!! LOL!

  6. Been reading for a while but first time commenter here:)

    I feel and am the exact same way. Though I do believe I have shared a snap shot on IG ONCE and only because it was a post that answered questions people on there have asked me over an over....and I haven't done it again and NEVER on FB. I too don't want to be judged by the teacher I had in HS(is that weird I do have some on my FB?) and I also feel more times than not I am just NOT a good blogger.

    Love this post- all well said.

  7. I feel the same way!! I have shared my blog with my sister and best friend, but I like that it's separate from my Facebook "friends."

  8. I 100% agree with everything you said! =)

  9. I agree! I have shared a few snapshots of my posts on Instagram, but I don't have that many followers there so it's not a big deal. Someone a while back posted my blog url on her facebook page in a way to promote it for me (she was only being nice), and I was literally sweating until she removed it, all the while explaining that I didn't want my critical mother creepin' on me and telling me later that she was disappointed in me. However, I do feel that if I posted to Facebook, I would have more followers, more people to share my words with. Right now, though, not that many read it and I just don't know how to change that, so I'm stuck, you know?

    Thank you so much for sharing this. As you can see by the previous commenters, you are not alone!

  10. That's how I feel about my instagram. I have pics that I post on that, that I don't link to facebook just because I don't want certain super creepers knowing every aspect of my biz! Sometimes it's just nice to have something that isn't public where you can just say or post whatever the hell you want! ;)

  11. I totally get it, girl! I love that you are so real on here and that's hard to do when you know your whole family and all your close friends are reading!